Monday, March 4, 2019

When your Hubby feels like he failed

due to a major mistake on his part and it costs you 6 months of income and he has to tell you just hours before your back procedure that will have you down for 5 days (My sister in law is down for 12 wks, no BLT for ether of us... that's no bending, lifting or twisting. but our Hubbys which are brothers are having fun with no BLT's).

As hard as it is for him to face this, it was harder for me to see him with his head in his hands not knowing what to do and feeling like a failure.

He has been looking for a 30 ft-32 ft flat bed trailer for hauling things  OUT OF STATE... which requires a commercial tag on the trailer... He knew that. He asked at the BMV how much it would cost... no problem , he has that set back. What he should have asked was for the regulations of commercial tags for trailers.   I still sigh....I actually sighed just writing it.

He got a really good deal and a bill of sale (common in our area) and went to get the tags... He knew he had to go get a weight slip so got that done.Still no big deal.

OOPS... it weighed over a certain amount and so can't be used for commercial unless he has the actual title. SO he makes calls, goes and spends 3 days on the ground with snow and bitter cold trying to find VIN numbers literally scrubbed the entire frame with a steel brush trying to find the numbers  to realize he bought a salvaged trailer so no title.Whomever did the repair work did a great job. I wish we could afford to keep it and not resell it as it was new.He called about getting a salvage title and was told he could do that for personal use ONLY, not commercial.  The company that sold the trailer back in 2007 is searching their records hoping against impossible odds as he could only find 3 of the 17 VIN numbers, that they can locate it for him... otherwise... Thursday he will have to buy ANOTHER trailer that has a title as he had work already lined up starting next week that will be WEEKLY.This is NOT something he can put off. Putting things off is something he is really really good at.

The good news the company we bought our smaller trailer( about half the size he needs for the work) has a few in stock so he won't have to order it, but he will have to buy and install a wench.  IF the other company comes up with nothing, which the lady that is even working weekends on her own time to help him told him the chances are in the miracle area...HE is holding on to the IF....

Meanwhile since I can't do BLT I worked out the worse. Called our finance guy, updated him and if it gets bad we can pull from IRAs, he just needs 7 days notice. AND I spent the weekend rereading The Prudent Homemaker.

Reworked the budget(seems like a daily thing right now) and handed him the budget written out on paper as he asked.

OPTIONS FOR EARNING/BRINGING IN MONEY

taxi for Amish
hauling with trailer.
Selling extra produce if have
Selling extra plants if have
"barn" sale this coming fall.
I need to get back on Swagbucks as this is my primary "income" for Amazon.
Make sure I do my Pine cone surveys.
I need to make sure I do the reimbursement for the health ins with in 2 wks so we have that money back to pay the next month's bill. We have 18 months left in Hubby's RRA from his ex employer.


Priorities for the house now

Garden needs (already in my savings etc).

gravel for deck (already in my savings for April, decking in is barn)

energy audit (already in my savings for May)

insulation ( have some in my savings but not sure what we will do as the windows seem to be the worse, if so I will plastic on the OUTSIDE as all the dogs get in the windows to look out and dog nails go right through plastic). Hubby said he had some insulation still out in the barn he was going to use there so if needed it will come to the house instead.

Replacing trailers money.This will be coming from Hubby's jobs he does.


What has changed?

Instead of ordering 2000 gal of propane which would give us a cushion for bad weather.... we will get 1600 gal. Means I have to be watchful of how I use the cook stove and keeping the furnace down(like I do now) and insulate. Means I HAVE to make the time to sew insulated curtains for the house for next winter.I just tossed what ever we had up this winter even though they weren't insulated.

Hubby will be changing the oil in my car but paying the mechanic for his due to his warranty, lowering the amount needed in that budget. I will be needing brakes this year, that remains in the budget.

Our sump pump has been acting up, the contractor was willing to tell Hubby 3 different ways to fix it depending on what is really wrong with it and Hubby can do the work himself. We might have to buy some drain pipe,Hubby has that in his savings as he knew if the drain pipe was the issue he would need money for it.

We will take the dogs to our old vet as even with the mileage he is almost half the price of the local clinic for their shots. Toe nails are on us that saves us $30 a month but takes both to cut them.We found another place in town that sells the dog food we use at a great price.Our vet is also the cheapest for their heart worm and flea meds.

Eating out was flipped from grocery budget to spending money ($50 each for the month), I very seldom spend mine , unless I need clothes so it goes to savings. Hubby uses his for coffee and food if he can't pack his lunch. FYI, when he is on the road with Amish they most times BUY his lunch for him and if they are packing their lunches themselves they say something before hand so he knows to pack his lunch. WHICH means we won't be eating out very often as I am not known to pay with MY spending money when I already have food in house.

Grocery budget is $26... yes per month... that is 4 gals.of milk (1 for yogurt) 1 gal of buttermilk, 2 bunches of celery, 2 lbs of carrots, 10 lbs of potatoes, and 3 lbs of onions. Produce will go away during the summer growing so the budget will drop to $12.40 so I can flip the $13.60 to non food when I don't buy that.SO I took the non food out of the budget. I will have to "earn" for stocking up and meat (turkey and ham mostly) this fall.

I averaged out what we have used in electric and it's about $50 a month less than I had budgeted. We will just have to open windows and close curtains to keep the heat out during the summer instead of using the central air which we planned on doing anyways since we have French doors to where the deck will be.

My meds and our over counter meds has dropped by 50%

Each vehicle gets 1 tank of gas a month, anything more than that comes out of what we earn.I based this on what we spent on all 3 vehicles since last Sept.. Hubby pays his truck gas out of his earnings of his job (jobs) but I am not willing to count on odd jobs to pay for all his gas.

We will still be putting a the same amount in savings. This is not an option as far as I am concerned.It's not much at all but it does keep the checking accounts free.Hubby does put 10% of his paycheck in a retirement fund through the state while he is plowing during the winter.

Non food has been removed from budget. I should be able to pick up it when I am not buying produce. I have stocked up on hand washing dish soap and personal items. I will need dishwasher soap, dishwasher rinse and the never ending need of toilet paper.

After I finish with this year's $$ for garden ( remember I already have it put aside from last year) I will put what ever is left in next year's budget. Next year's budget is set at $15/month. This is the soil I need to start my seeds and the manure I buy from my neighbor. I am focusing on heirloom/open pollinated this year and saving my own seeds. I will still have seeds from this year for next year and I should be able by the end of next year know which varieties work best here.

House maintenance. $40 down from $100.Our water softener company flipped some plumbing (for free) so the well water goes through the softener 1st and the filter after that so we don't change the filter every 2 wks but now every 3 months.They have a "flush out" they do when they bring the salt . We actually pay less NOW with renting the softener than when we were only paying for salt and filters at the other house... about 3/4 savings. AND they deliver the salt and put it in.

By cutting the budget this hard we have enough in SAVINGS to go until Dec before having to look at pulling more than we do from the IRA's which we only pull a small amount.

Here's to a FRUGAL year.





11 comments:

  1. I feel sorry for your husband as he is probably kicking himself. But we've all done it. We didn't know WHAT to ask, and so made a wrong decision.

    Do I understand it right that when you resell the salvage trailer you'll be okay and not out any money?

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    1. probably will be out of pocket some... 2 different trailer companies that sell trailers said it was worth what we paid but will be hard to resell for personal use only and no title. The original company is waiting back on an answer from their head office to see if they could take it as a trade in . They are in Tennessee and we are in Northern OH.

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  2. Thank goodness for a well stocked pantry!

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    1. For Sure on that one. A sigh of relief that I pushed that be refilled and not wait like Hubby wanted me to. We are low on veggies and getting low on fruit but it's late winter so that's the norm for this time of year.

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  3. I feel bad for your husband, what a dilemma. I think you should inform your amish neighbors of your situation and see what they can do to help. Offer your services. Tell them you need to earn money and see what they come up with.

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    1. We did, they offered to find talk to someone that would rent us a trailer so he doesn't lose the jobs he has already accepted

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  4. DO you have insulators behind your switch and plug plates? It made a HUGE difference here. We put them on exterior and interior walls and stopped feeling a drafty cold 'breeze' in our house.

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    1. Most of them, have to go dig through barn to find more. I also have those plugs to stop children from putting stuff in the outlets. That helped also.

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  5. You worked really hard a while back to fill everything up in your food storage. I'm so glad you did. Now, your hard work is going to pay off, big-time.

    Mistakes happen to everyone. It's good you can support him with a practical plan, because he probably feels so bad that he was the one that made the mistake. I remember bouncing the checkbook one time, completely by accident, and feeling so guilty and bad that the fees had to be paid, while my husband was so forgiving and supportive. I'm glad you have a good relationship and can work through it together. It's a really good thing that he can find some odd jobs and earn some money.

    Hang in there. I hope you soon feel better from your back surgery.

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    1. I have to laugh Becky as he is the one that has been to one to over draw the checking which is why he has his own checking account and the main bills are from a separate account. He uses a debit care but doesn't enter it into the register. WHERE I use cash that I pull from the account once a month.

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  6. I am so against debit cards for that exact reason. Years ago I worked for a very small company that was owned by a man that used his debit card constantly and almost NEVER wrote it in the checkbook later. I was the bookkeeper and tallied the books once a month against the bank. He always had far less in the account than he thought because of this. I could never break him of the habit.

    I, too, get a chunk of cash every once in a awhile, and slowly draw down on it. For everything else it's credit cards. Love those airline, hotel, or cashback points.

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