Friday, May 26, 2023

if I started crying

I am not sure I would stop and I need to do for Hubby first.... a roller coaster week for sure.

 Apples are starting to make. That's a good sign.

Hubby's trailer is fixed after almost 3 wks. of losing work...$3200 later SIGH. He used his SS to cover the bill to the Mennonite company that did the repair (they don't take credit cards) and the bank let him do extend a payment for the parts he bought on his credit card. Mennonite arranged for him to get their "discount" since he drove a total of 4 hrs. to go get the parts for them. Finding parts was the hardest part. SO it the govt doesn't cover the debt ceiling and they don't seen SS checks we are going to be hurting bad.

The strawberries and black raspberries are in bloom, should be getting strawberries in a week if it gets warm like they are forecasting as we had a cool down with mornings in the low 40s and highs in the 60s, low 70s

I will now only go get groceries once a month with a pick up of milk two weeks later when Hubby is getting fuel as the medical bills will be through the roof for the next couple months. I did save $81.11 on groceries this past week, a bit over 20%. and Hubby saved a bit over $5 using the Kroger's fuel points. I now have $12 in Fresh Mode points and over 500 pts for fuel for June. We will have to start buying eggs. Free range, organic is running $2.50 with the Amish. M isn't getting enough to have extra with 12 of them at the table I understand that completely.

Hubby had a change in behavior followed by not processing things. I brought it up to our primary and he scheduled an appt. with the neurologist who ordered a MRI, Primary ordered extensive blood work and put him on B complex vitamins, thinking it's a vitamin deficiency.   

Blood work is in. Back off the B complex. He is not deficient in anything. He does have low thyroid and metabolic syndrome plus the A1C is 6.1 (both of us for over 30 yrs have had this number).

Went to see the neurologist, The MRI showed brain damage BUT the brain is NOT shrinking at this point. He has no feeling below his knees. Was told to stay off ladders since he doesn't know where his feet is (he pointed to them and told the doctor they were on the end of his legs. Even Doc laughed).

He couldn't do simple subtraction (he tutored me in math in high school and tutored the kids and their friends), broke my heart as I hadn't picked that up. BUT what I did pick up was he wasn't remembering what we would decide on or what I said to him about things. The nurse while testing him gave him a sentence that he was to repeat back to her exactly as she said it. He said the reverse. Specialist gave him the sentence ... go to second traffic light, turn right, the house is the 3rd on the left. Hubby came back with , go to the light , turn left and it's the 3rd house on the right. Specialist looked at me and's not you, but he isn't going to repeat back what you said. If it's important WRITE IT DOWN. Hubby asked me if I write it down in the memo pad he carries to write it in red so he knows it's important.

 Specialist made it clear he has to have a routine (hubby admitted he battle me on this), he has to eat healthy (berries in any form daily) And if he starts hauling at 7 am , and he isn't hauling that day, he needs to do work around the house starting at 7 AM. Meals need to be close to the same time daily. He has to do physical work 1 hr. every day including Sunday. Push mowing the yard, splitting, stacking and hauling wood counts if he is doing it by hand or wagon, not tractor. He has to have at least 10,000 steps a day. He gets about 7,000. 

He told Hubby that he was lucky as usually by time he sees the patient the MRI shows the brain has shrank. My noticing the change in behavior and didn't blow off he was forgetting due to old age is going to make a big difference on how it progresses. Hubby told Specialist that he worked 3rd for 40 yrs even when he was farming and that he could always float his lunch time so he made sure the diabetics ate when they need to even if it meant he was eating lunch  30 minutes before clocking out for the night. 

He will be scheduled with neuropsychologist to pinpoint what caused the damage, could be chemical from farming,  from working with aluminum, rheumatic fever, motorcycle accident, hearing loss, eyesight loss, or dementia. He will also have a sleep study to make sure the sleep apnea is not back and testing nerve testing for hand and feet. 

He has to eat a brain health diet and told him to eat 1/2 cup of berries at least twice a week, daily would be better in any form as Doc knows that berries are expensive... We both laughed and told him we actually grow all sorts of berries and two types of grapes.  

Hubby did tell him that he had been copping a nasty attitude towards me because he thought I was lying to him. I got an apology from Hubby and the Specialist made it clear that I was doing very well, to keep that type of watch over him. If something improves he wants to know it along with what is getting worse. 

He definitely will NOT be doing the finances. 

We did decide, I wrote it out and he signed and dated it, that we would tell his parents in person he was having issues, that he had brain damage and being tested to find out what caused it. When we do that I will let his sister in law (retired nurse) tell his siblings as they live in her area and see her daily so they can question her instead of the parents. We will do the same with our kids except Son2 who is our caretaker if something happens who we told on the way home. 


I have hurt the right leg that the fake hip is in and I am now waiting for a call back to see if they want me to come in to see them or if they want to order a test to see if I messed up the hip  or muscle. I am limping, can't take my normal stride in walking and the knee has gave twice now on stairs.  I am hoping for pulled muscle and NOT follow Daughter 1's footsteps of breaking the stem to the leg bone that she did TWICE.

Prayer for peace and sanity

Stay safe

Blessed Be


  1. I am so sorry you are having such a difficult time and that your husband has serious health problems. Good on you for knowing your husband so well that you picked up his problems when you did. I hope that things work out better than you anticipate. I always enjoy reading your blog.

  2. Prayers ! When it rains, it pours. You are such a good partner, keeping hubby under your watchful eye. He is a lucky man.

  3. Goodness gracious, you certainly are packing a lot of stress into a small amount of time. Please, in this time of being a caretaker, set aside some hours a week where you can decompress, otherwise you will end up hurting yourself. It is not possible to be hyper alert and on duty 24 hours a day for months without side effects. I will send prayers your way. Hilogene in Az

  4. So sorry for all the problems. I hope that you feel better soon with your leg. I know it has to be a lot of worry.

  5. See if you can find a book by Dr. Mary Newport. It's about memory loss and how diet affects it. May learn something new to help your husband. Hang in there. Hope you both feel better soon.

  6. Praying everything works out well for you and your husband.

  7. WOW! With all this going on, he surely won't be driving, will he? When Tommy's blood sugar is down, he thinks I am lying to him and trying to kill him. AND, he refuses to test his blood sugar level, says he knows what he is doing. So frustrating for you, I know.

  8. Sounds just like I was dealing with Joel, but you will see where you have to adjust. I am so sorry.